In the spirit of showcasing a dude who can live up to our female f.a.t.ty pick of the week (Suzanne Somers), we chose a man who also beat cancer to go on to achieve amazing things in his career. We choose Lance Armstrong as our f.a.t.ty (Fit After Thirty Hotty) dude of the week, because we heard he is coming out of retirement for the 2009 cycling season and we think he is the closest thing to the Bionic Man that we can think of!
We Can Rebuild Him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world’s first bionic man. Lance Armstrong will be that man.
In 1996 when he was diagnosed with testicular cancer, it had already spread to his lungs, brain, and stomach. He had brain surgery and a drug therapy treatment and battled back to return to cycling in 1998. It sounds unbelievable that this guy was back on a bike only two years after beating a deadly disease!
Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster.
Before his cancer, Armstrong had won a single stage of the Tour de France two separate times – once in 1993 and once in 1995. In 1999, only a couple years after recovering from cancer, he won his first Tour de France.
His feats are so astounding that he is the most tested athlete in the world when it comes to performance- enhancing drugs. They have not yet started testing for bionic implants, and when they do, we are sure he will test positive, but as for drugs – he always comes up clean!
To highlight the full strength of his bionic legs, he has run three marathons – one per year - since he retired from cycling in 2005.
And keeping in the true spirit of the Bionic Man to use his powers for good, and just like our female f.a.t.ty this week, he has used his battle with cancer to help other people. He created the Lance Armstrong Foundation to aid people affected by cancer, and his LiveStrong campaign, which gave us the popular yellow bracelets bearing the phrase, continues to raise a ton of money for his foundation through the sale of a variety of LiveStrong merchandise. He also continues to lobby the U.S. Congress on behalf of cancer patients.
Michelle and I both think he is sexy as hell and we are currently fighting over which one of us is more deserving of being his Jaime Sommers now that he and Kate Hudson have broken up.
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[...] Just looking at her should tell you why she wins the title of *f.a.t.ty (Fit After Thirty Hotty) of the week. She’s got a body of a woman half her age, which should tell all of you that the old attitudes and stereotypes about aging, can be thrown out right along with that boyfriend who didn’t appreciate you (Can anyone say Lance Armstrong?) [...]