I will never forget the “bush” story that my coworker, Mike, told me fourteen years ago.  He was about 28 and was married to a cute blonde named Melanie who was his age.  At a previous job, he had worked with a 55 year old southern woman, Evelyn, who was concerned  after seeing a female swimsuit calendar on another guy’s desk. She discreetly came into Mike’s office and shut the door. Imitating what I now think of as a Paula Deen-like accent, (from The Food Network) Mike relayed his conversation with his co-worker.

“Mike, does Melanie have a big patch or a little patch?”

“She’s not a pirate, Evelyn.” He told her.

“No, not that kind of patch.” She said. Then she lowered her voice to a whisper and continued. “The patch of grass down there.” She said, as she pointed to her lap.

Mike said he nearly choked on his coffee and turned three shades of red while she proceeded to explain that she noticed that the models in the calendar seemed “really bare on the sides of their panties”, and she was wondering if she was normal, so she was really hoping that he’d tell her that his wife Melanie had a large patch like hers, to put her mind at ease.

Now imagine this poor young guy as he had to explain to someone his mom’s age, that in his experience, women have varying amounts of natural growth, but that most women he knows, regardless the size of the God given “patch” still do some sort of removal or grooming along the bikini line, at least during summer. He then explained that he was pretty sure that the calendar swimsuit models have it professionally removed, at a salon.

That story happened years ago when hair removal was thought of as more of a fad or a trend. You would have had to be living in a cave for the last ten years not to know that hair removal has evolved into a big business and is an increasingly popular grooming priority to most women.

And if you have been living in a cave and just emerged, you might be sorely disappointed to learn that your furry bikini line will not be as popular outside the den as it was in hibernation with all the other bears.

In fact, it’s not just bikini line pubes that a lot of women are removing. The Brazilian style, where all of it is removed, is very common. Lucky for us, the pain of waxing down there is not our only option. Laser hair removal has given us a less painful option, which is said to be permanent for most people after five treatments, and can be done anywhere on the body.

Everyone is different, so some may experience minor re-growth at some point, others never do. But almost everyone experiences a huge reduction. I can tell you it’s not a walk in the park for the underarms and bikini area, and if you’re going for full Brazilian, opt for numbing cream in advance if you have 45 minutes to let it sit before your treatment. Legs, however, are not that painful at all. And with recent advancements in lasers, which now have cooling systems added to cool the skin as the laser zaps it, it’s becoming an even more comfortable experience. 

A few important points: It won’t work on blonde hair, and just a few years ago it wasn’t recommended for darker skin tones. However, newer lasers such as YAG lasers make laser hair removal an option for women of color. In terms of where to go, I highly recommend Sona Med Spa, if you have one in your city, as they specialize in this, so they seem to always have the most advanced technology and are knowledgeable about a wide variety of lasers. Also, they consistently offer sales and package deals, and have many locations across the country. 

Or, you can just go back in the cave and not worry about it.