Why do people sometimes judge harshly men and women whose list of required attributes in a long term partner includes a fit, healthy body? Not long ago, a friend accused me of being a female version of the movie character Shallow Hal when I refused her attempts to set me up  with a heavyset male friend of hers. “Yes.” I said. “And you know what “Hal” is short for? Hallelujah! Because I’ll be with someone who can keep up with me!”

She didn’t think it was funny. “You’re too picky.” She told me.”  To which I replied, “Comparing me to a movie character won’t make me more open to dating a guy whose activities, energy level, eating habits, overall lifestyle and health for raising future kids are so drastically disparate than mine.” Besides, I had tried overlooking things like that in the past, and knew from personal experience that it just doesn’t work for me.

“By the way”, I went on to explain, “Shallow Hal desiring the more svelte version of Gwynyth Paltrow, as opposed to the obese version, is not a critical flaw in a man, because brain biology compels men to desire those women who are more capable of reproducing and perpetuating the species!”

This is the same brain biology that causes women to seek out, and be attracted to, men who would be good providers. Sure, she gets labeled as a gold digger, in much the same way that Hal is labeled as “shallow” for wanting the healthiest fertile female to bear his children, but in essence, “gold digging” is rooted in her brain biology. And how can you blame a woman for wanting to choose a man who would best be able to provide for their future offspring?  But I have long maintained that fertile women especially, also have a biological need to be concerned with a man’s physicality just as he is with hers. 

Sure, every one of us knows someone who exemplifies the extremes where mate selection is concerned. These are the women whose friends call “too picky” because she expects every guy to have a six pack, or a net worth of 3 million or more, before she’ll say yes to a date. Guys in this category are the ones that look like John Goodman, but won’t ask any woman out that doesn’t have a body like Jessica Biel.

Okay, so let me make it clear that I’m not talking about these outliers. I’m talking about healthy, athletic, and fit people who themselves maintain a fairly flat stomach and some level of muscle mass, and are seeking close to the same in a partner. 

Think about it this way. On a subconscious level, a lot goes into what makes someone attractive to us. There’s a lot more involved than just whether an oversized gut looks sexy or not, to our “new”, evolved brain; or whether his love of the couch will clash with our love of bike riding during the courting phase.

A woman’s “old”, reptilian brain has to consider whether a dude carrying an extra 50 pounds will keel over from a heart attack, or go blind from diabetes, leaving her to provide for her offspring on her own. Not to mention whether he will be too lethargic and lazy to help her chase a two year old around. But now there is a study that also shows that the reasons to consider a man’s weight during the selection phase, run even deeper - all the way down to the quality of his sperm!

Yup, that’s right. As it turns out, if his belly is the size of Santa’s, you shouldn’t expect his sack to be filled with the greatest of gifts! If a fat man’s swimmers were jewels, they’d be cubic zirconium and not Tiffany diamonds, sorry to say. God love our obese men for their minds, their loving hearts, their handsome faces, penis size, and big paychecks even, but not their faulty sperm.

According to 2008 research presented at a meeting of the European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology, men with a higher body mass index (BMI) had lower volumes of seminal fluid and a higher proportion of abnormal sperm. So, this translates to difficulty conceiving healthy little babies. (Obesity in women is also a contributing factor for difficult conception).

The study went like this: Dr. A Ghiyath Shayeb, from the University of Aberdeen, Aberdeen, UK, and fellow scientists, examined seminal fluid analysis of 5316 men attending Aberdeen Fertility Center for conception difficulties. Of these, 2037 had complete data on their BMIs.

The scientists divided the men into four groups according to their BMI.  After accounting for characteristics that could confound the analysis, such as alcohol consumption, smoking, age, social deprivation and the length of time of abstinence prior to producing the sample, the team looked for a relationship between semen quality and BMI.

The overweight men, on the other hand, had a 60 percent higher chance of having a low volume of semen, according to the research. They also had a 40 percent higher chance of having some sperm abnormalities.

According to Dr. Shayeb, “The mechanism for the relationship could be a number of things – different hormone levels in obese men, simple overheating of the testicles caused by excessive fat in the area, or that the lifestyle and diet that leads to obesity could also lead to poorer semen quality. We just don’t know the answer yet, but this is an important question that needs urgent attention.”

So, ladies, next time you’re couch potato man is pounding a quarter pounder in front of the boob tube, when you want him to join you for a hike, show him this article, because most men wanting to have kids will be protective of their tadpoles and resulting bloodline that they create!